TOM: Please God, make that asteroid hit Godzilla and spare us all!

MIKE: Oprah stars in Beloved, the true-life story about the inappropriate love between her and 200 million dollars woth of bon-bons.

CROW: Bowling, it's ball licking good.

MIKE: Drew Barrymore and an incredible simulation of Adam Sandler star in Ye Olde Wedding Singer. TOM: Thou spin me right round, baby, right round, like a spinning wheel, right round, round, round.

CROW: First Travolta, now Cage! What is it with angels, black trench coats, and dogs?!

TOM: Excuse me ma'am, have you heard the word of Satan?

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